DISCLAIMER: Before we start, this rant is more of a public service announcement from the perspective of a straight male, that of which is yours truly. Yes, there can be women who are a little on the insane side of things, but this is primarily about dudes. Just to throw that out there.
SECOND DISCLAIMER: If you think at all this is an anti-homosexual piece because I happen to mention homosexual men, just stop. Seriously. Humans of all shapes, sizes, sexes and preferences can be creepy assholes. No one is exempt from this. We at Metal Made Fitness do not single people out because of who they are, it’s what they do and their actions. Anyone from any walk of life can be an asshole. Agree? Agree. If you don’t, you got problems. READ ON METAL PEOPLE!
Dear Guys at the gym…..STOP BEING A GYM CREEPER.
I’m pretty observant. I like to keep my eyes open and keep tabs on my surroundings. And I’m also very good at seeing what other people are doing via mirrors. It’s something I learned when I was 19 working as a Floor Manager at a strip club trying to use mirror to tally couch dances. This was before my lucrative career as the DJ, but even then we learned to use mirrors to keep an eye on dancers so dudes wouldn’t get out of hand. So using mirrors is something I’m pretty good at when surveying the landscape.
In my years at the gym I have noticed and come to a conclusion: Men, whether gay or straight, are predators. That’s right, it might not be PC to say that but gay men are just as guilty of this as straight guys. Dudes are dudes. You’re not exempt or immune from criticism on this subject. If you have a penis and testicles you probably have this thing called “raging testosterone” and you wake up with the need to put your penis into anything possible, because testosterone happens. No matter who you go for your in your private life though, you still have that same asshole predatory “invading space” mentality as any college frat guy harassing girls at a party. Even if you don’t want to admit it, it’s there. Shit, I have it sometimes. Some can control it, and meet their desired types no problem, but others have serious issues with keeping it in check. Match that with social awkwardness and you might do some creeping without knowing it. So stop being delusional that this isn’t a thing. This is aimed at ALL types of dudes, no matter your preference. Mostly straight dudes, but all dudes included.
For the guys out there who are cool, and go in, and mind their business at the gym, and kick ass, work out, and respect everyone’s space, kudos! You the real MVP. This isn’t for you. You’re doing great, probably have healthy relationships with others and you keep just on keeping on.
For the guys who are being creeps, you’re about to get a verbal assault. Chances are you’re completely oblivious to the fact you think you are doing anything wrong in the first place. So you’re getting called out. Starting now.
1) YOU STARE TOO MUCH, TOO LONG.
Staring does not do anything but make you look like a psychotic freak. I don’t care if a woman is dressed in form fitting clothes on the leg machine or the guy you’re trying to bore a hole through with your gaze looks good. YOU ARE MAKING IT OBVIOUS WHAT YOU ARE DOING. I have been at the gym and pointed out to friends “dude that guy stopped what he doing and is literally staring non-stop at that girl”. You might as well have binoculars. And I get it, I’m a guy that loves women and I will look when I see one. Key word LOOK. But I also know anything past 1-2 seconds is not a “look” it’s a stare. I’m there to workout and do my thing. If a woman and I start mutually conversing, then cool. But I’m smart enough to know the difference. If you wanna look at people in a creepy-ass way longer than than a second or two, go to a strip club of your choosing. Otherwise, don’t be shocked if someone calls you out for being a GYM CREEP. Eye-raping isn’t attractive, it’s pathetic.
2) YOU FOLLOW/STALK
Dude, seriously. I’ve seen guys completely modify their workout to follow a girl around the gym. For example, the gym I train at there is this guy who is on a normal schedule for a bodybuilding program. He does the same stuff each day of the week. The other day he did legs, and then arms. The problem is the day before he did back and arms. And this second day of arms happen to be where this young girl wearing form fitting clothing was, EVERY STATION SHE WENT. It was obvious what the guy was doing too. We’ve seen people go as far as to modify their workouts to stock people to where we’ve kicked them out of the gym for it. If you’re there to follow someone without talking to them like that, that is called BEING PATHETIC. If you don’t know how to approach someone and say hi, LEARN. And if someone isn’t interested, CEASE ANY ACTION TOWARD THEM. And if you’re clearly making the other person uncomfortable and you don’t realize it YOU MIGHT BE PART TED BUNDY AKA SERIAL KILLER. Seek help immediately asshole.
3) YOU HAVE A SPYCAM ON YOUR PHONE
I can’t believe I even have to say anything about this but apparently there are whole websites dedicated to dudes who take secret pictures of girls at the gym and THEY POST THEM ONLINE. WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU DUDE? If you’re doing this, go call your Mom or Dad immediately and tell them they screwed up raising you and you’re a disgrace of a son. This is illegal to do and I hope you get caught for doing it you CREEPY ASS BASTARD.
4) YOU CROWD SOMEONE
Ok this something unfortunately I’ve seen gay men and old guys do at the gym more than anything. Straight dudes generally will creep from a bit of a distance from what my female friends have told me. Old guys don’t give a fuck, and gay guys seem to think this is like acceptable also. If a girl or guy is at a part of the gym where there is a lot of space, doing planks for example DO NOT SET UP RIGHT NEXT TO THEM. That is about as creepy as can be. This ain’t a parking lot with no cars in it where you’re trying to get close to the mall entrance. It’s a gym floor. There are plenty of spaces and unless it’s cramped, back off. Nothing says “gym rapist” like a dude that tries laying next to a girl doing ab crunches. And the other thing, if there is plenty of mirror room, DON’T STAND BEHIND SOMEONE. That is really fucking creepy.
Here are some testimonials about what you gym creeps are doing. Seriously, this is how pathetic you dudes are….
“…. a guy kept following me around the gym, and when I’d start using a piece of equipment, he’d just find one about 5 or 10 feet away and act like he was actually just working out. I lost it when I sat on the machine to work adductors, which would require me to spread my legs, and he sat down on a machine directly opposite of me. I jumped right back up, glared at him, and went to the front desk to complain. The staff at that time was afraid of any sort of confrontation or awkward situation, so they did nothing. I saw him in there a few more times after that, then never again.” CREEPSTER McCREEPERSON!!!
“…At my old gym there was a guy my dad’s age that was always staring at me and smiling and one day he was clearly “excited”. So yeah, I went home and vomited a little.” Hashtag #THATCREEPERLIFE
“… I did have a guy sign out his kids from the day care after me and found my name on the sign out sheet. He then Facebook messaged me that that’s how he found me. He got kicked out of the gym for that, there was more to his message than that but just gross…” GRADUATE OF THE TED BUNDY ACADEMY OF CREEPERS.
So are we clear Gym Creeps? You hear what we’re saying here? Hopefully. If not, you have a mental problem and you probably shouldn’t be in a public setting until you get it fixed. Women are not there for you to gawk at like a piece of meat, ESPECIALLY when they are there to reach their fitness goals. I don’t care how ‘hot” they look. Stop living in a porn fantasy. Same goes for guys towards other guys. If you’re being creepy towards a guy to the point where one says something to you like “mind your business”, do so. The gym is where someone goes to obtain fitness, health and a better self. It’s not your meat market. It’s not your fantasy grounds. Stop being a CREEP.