Fuel For The Fire: Fanning the Flames of Discontent

Smoking tobacco has been around since man and woman first needed something to do after bumping uglies. It’s a fact. Look it up on Wikipedia. Since the tobacco leaf was discovered, it’s been used all the world over. And when smoking it wasn’t enough, some crazy bastard thought chewing it would be a great idea. And then dipping it.

I mean, sure, sounds great on the surface. Chewing a weird nightshade plant to stimulate the senses. Who wouldn’t think that’s awesome? But couple in a whole cornucopia of risk factors like heart disease and lung cancer, among many health concerns, and what do you have? Easy.

SMOKING IS NOT METAL.

Even those kooky people at the World Health Organization named tobacco as the world’s single greatest cause of preventable death. Excluding mass murder by government organizations of course.

So let’s say you are trying to be a down-on-his-luck detective like a Bruce Willis b-movie character and look cool smoking. You know what is more cool than that? Not getting cancer. So finish that smoke and then put it away. Forever. Why? Well I’ll tell you why!

What happens when you stop smoking?
In 20 minutes your blood pressure returns to normal.
In 8 hours the carbon monoxide (toxic shit!) in your blood stream drops by half and oxygen levels return to normal.
In 48 hours your chance of having a heart attack begins it’s decline. All the nicotine leaves your body.
In 72 hours your bronchial tubes relax and your energy starts to increase.
In 2 weeks your circulation will increase and will continue to improve.
In 3-9 months coughs and breathing problems will fade and your lung capacity will increase by 10%.
In 1 year your risk of having a heart attack drops by half.
In 5 years your risk of a stroke returns to that of a non-smoker
In 10 years your risk of lung cancer returns to that of a non-smoker.

Coupled with that, not only will you save money (each pack is now around $8) but you’ll feel better, your skin will improve, and your clothes won’t smell like smoke anymore. The only downside to it is after sex you won’t smoke anymore, you’ll just have to have more sex. I know right? Horrible.

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